You want three things in your divorce lawyer; expertise, reliability, and the right attitude. The best attorney to employ is one who, for at least half their time, is dealing with divorce cases and is fully skilled in mediation techniques. All this will be waste if you do not feel you can trust them, so look for a person you feel comfortable with.
Adversarial attorneys will use the hammer to crack a walnut approach which often happens when these cases go to court whereas an attorney who specializes in mediation will take a much calmer approach. Preparation for both your divorce lawyer and yourself is important so when you contact them, make sure you know exactly what you intend to question them about.
Make sure you know exactly what you intend to ask and record the answers as each time you contact your lawyer there will be a charge involved so note times dates and durations of conversations. Keep a record of all correspondence and conversations and try where possible to have conversations on the phone which will reduce the amount of time required to see them in person.
Your attorney is there for advice and any foreseeable legal actions so do not rely on them for anything but what you are paying them for, and especially not as a shoulder to cry on. Remember your divorce lawyer needs to remain detached and should not be involved in anything that is not directly related to the divorce case.
Being in control of your own case and your own life is the single best thing you can do, so it is essential that you have a lawyer who can work on that basis. You are employing them for their experience but at the same time you need them to understand that it is your divorce and you want to make the decisions about how it is too proceed. Ask that you be sent copies of all documents and letters and let them know that you expect phone calls to be answered by the next working day after all you are the one paying the bills.
If money is an issue, it may be a preferable for you to only contact a lawyer for legal advice on a marital settlement but not representation. After you have organized all your facts and read about how the law works in your case, if you still have questions about the law or the likely outcome, write all your questions down and ask your lawyer. It is not uncommon for people to draw up their own marital settlements with the help of a divorce lawyer who is familiar with the case.
Adversarial attorneys will use the hammer to crack a walnut approach which often happens when these cases go to court whereas an attorney who specializes in mediation will take a much calmer approach. Preparation for both your divorce lawyer and yourself is important so when you contact them, make sure you know exactly what you intend to question them about.
Make sure you know exactly what you intend to ask and record the answers as each time you contact your lawyer there will be a charge involved so note times dates and durations of conversations. Keep a record of all correspondence and conversations and try where possible to have conversations on the phone which will reduce the amount of time required to see them in person.
Your attorney is there for advice and any foreseeable legal actions so do not rely on them for anything but what you are paying them for, and especially not as a shoulder to cry on. Remember your divorce lawyer needs to remain detached and should not be involved in anything that is not directly related to the divorce case.
Being in control of your own case and your own life is the single best thing you can do, so it is essential that you have a lawyer who can work on that basis. You are employing them for their experience but at the same time you need them to understand that it is your divorce and you want to make the decisions about how it is too proceed. Ask that you be sent copies of all documents and letters and let them know that you expect phone calls to be answered by the next working day after all you are the one paying the bills.
If money is an issue, it may be a preferable for you to only contact a lawyer for legal advice on a marital settlement but not representation. After you have organized all your facts and read about how the law works in your case, if you still have questions about the law or the likely outcome, write all your questions down and ask your lawyer. It is not uncommon for people to draw up their own marital settlements with the help of a divorce lawyer who is familiar with the case.
About the Author:
The author owns and operates Imago Relationship Therapy. Check our site at Lds Marriage Counseling.
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